Aphro’s Asskicking Anthems – April 2015

What it is, what it is, what it is, shed no tears! The one & only Aphro Dynamek is back again, spinning those hype sounds for all your beatdowns. This month's Anthem selection is going to be some seriously high octane stuff. After the jump, brace yourselves...

Damn straight! Brothers & sisters, tracks like this are why I would gladly choose going blind & mute over going deaf any day of the week. Talk about getting the blood boiling! For those who may be unaware, this track is from the OCRemix album, BadAss: Vol. II, which does the world a favor & reimagines some of the most memorable boss themes in gaming history. (I sincerely doubt I need to talk at any further length about how you should/need to be listening to these folks because I'm sure, by now, you're already way ahead of me on that.) To take it a step further, what you're hearing is the remixed version of the boss music from Sonic & Knuckles. I'll refrain from gushing over this song, but I will keep it 100: I spend at least 45 mins on this song whenever it shows up on my queue.

So now that I've talked it up so damn much, what fighter fits this song? I suppose I could choose any of the characters referenced on either BadAss album, but that would feel like cheating to me. Not cool with that idea. I could also try to match it up with someone whose appearence matches the tone of the song, but again... I'd be missing the point of this column. No, ladies & gentlemen, there's only one boss character that this song could belong to at the end of the day & let me be the first to say it: She's one insanely tough mother.

If daughters grow up to be like their mothers, Ky is so screwed...

If most daughters grow up to be anything like their mothers, Ky is (potentially) VERY screwed...

If you saw this pick coming, then congratulations... great minds really do think alike. I choose Guilty Gear's Justice because I feel the song embodies what she's all about: chaos & devastation. Justice instigated the Crusades, a freaking century-long war that ravaged the global populace & dissolved most of the world as we could conceptualize it. To put that into perspective, imagine if World War I was still going on today & was being fought against monstrous, hiveminded living weapons whose sole purpose was the total eradication of all human life. Pretty goddamn scary, isn't it? Justice was the proverbial 'queen bee' of that aforementioned hive.

There's also a secondary reason why I chose her for this month's selection. "Hedgehog Fodder" bears an uncanny resemblance to Justice's actual in-game theme, "Meet Again". If you really listen to them closely enough, you'll notice they both start off relatively peaceful, even a little subdued. Once the intro's done, though, buckle up & strap down tight because things get kicked up to 11 fairly quick & show no signs of slowing down until that last chord is struck. Like I said before, tracks like this make me glad I'm not deaf.

Until next time... keep fighting the good fight, my friends.

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