Aphro’s Asskicking Anthems – April 2016

What it is, what it is, what it is.. shed no tears! The one & only Aphro Dynamek is back yet again to spin all the crazy sounds that give life to your beatdowns. This month's Anthem is a bona fide classic. This is jam so creamy, it's always at the top.

Mmmm-mm-mmm! If you don't recognize this song, then... *sigh* I just don't think I have the words to convey my bewilderment. However, part of the responsibility that comes with being an avid music lover is that it falls to you to help educate others who may be musically unaware. Without further ado, say hello to simply one of the greatest anime opening themes of all time. "Tank!" by Seatbelts cuts such an image, it can stand totally independent of Cowboy Bebop on its own merit. While fans of the show will forever love its AMAZING soundtrack, the title sequence does such an amazing job of preparing you for the wild ride that this story is from beginning to end. Listen to this song with your eyes closed and I bet your imagination will take you right back to those good ol' Commodore Records days.

Now, as always, it falls to yours truly to try and match this song with a character who is in tune with the spirit of the music. Over the last few months, some of these picks have been very easy, but that doesn't necessarily mean the task has not proven difficult. Truth be told, this month's choice presented a challenge. A fortuitous conversation I had with my little brother-in-arms, KPB|Parappa, some time ago opened my eyes. We happen to end up talking about old franchises and that conversation is what led to my decision for this month's Anthem.

I bet I know what his wallet says...

"Now I want you to go into that bag and find my wallet."

Gone but not forgotten... Cracker Jack from the Street Fighter EX series and was the resident bruiser on the roster, which had its fair share of unforgettable personalities. Unfortunately for all of us, the EX series was discontinued due to legal issues between Capcom & Arika. However, that's not the most frustrating thing about those games. You see, for whatever reason, there was a massive retcon between the first & second games. To exacerbate things further, Jack's storyline was one of the most affected by it. In both instances, he was a bouncer who earned his nickname "Cracker" because of his weapon of choice. However, don't think he trusts his life to the weapon. Jack is a ferocious bare-knuckle boxer. If I was a betting man, I'd say he could probably give James Dalton a run for his money.

Imagine, if you will, you're tossing a few back in some dive bar that plays live music every so often. Before too long, the band starts jamming. Everyone present is more or less cool during the bulk of their set. To close the show, they break into a rendition of "Tank!" and some of the patrons get a little rowdy. In comes C. Jack and he starts doing what he does best. The band doesn't miss a lick, playing through the whole sordid affair. Someone makes the biggest mistake of their life & pulls a knife on Jack. Out comes Cracker and not unlike a conductor with his baton leading an orchestra, Jack puts that lumber to work. Next thing you know, that same unfortunate someone has made their involuntary exit courtesy of a home run swing. The band brings it home, Jack pulls up to the bar & orders himself a boilermaker... business as usual for the man known far & wide as Cracker Jack.

Until next time... keep fighting the good fight, my friends.

No Comments Yet.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.