Aphro’s Asskicking Anthems – July 2016

What it is, what it is, what it is... shed no tears! K-P-B.com is the place & your boy Aphro is on the case, back yet again with all the crazy sounds that breathe life to your beatdowns. This month's Asskicking Anthem is all about that jungle boogie... 

The jam invading your earspace right now is "Tropical Wars" by Masato Koike from the Dynasty Warriors 6 soundtrack (in case that wasn't already obvious). If you've been paying attention, you'll remember that I've talked about this game in passing before. I do believe the term I used to describe it was "beautiful misstep". However, one thing that they got 100% right in the game was the soundtrack. Totally separate from the game itself, I strongly recommend you sit down & give it a listen. There are some serious diamonds in that rough.

Before going any further, I want to spend a little time talking about the delicious irony of this song. You see, ever since Dynasty Warriors 3, there have been two notably unique characters on the roster: Meng Huo & Zhurong. These two didn't play like anyone else on the roster (until DW7) and that made them both such a blast to use. Meng Huo was all about crowd control with his moveset's emphasis on massive shockwaves & tremors. Zhurong, on the other hand, was a direct antithesis to that by focusing on speed & range over power. Historicially speaking, they were the king & queen of the Nanman Tribe during the Three Kingdoms Era. It was said that the Nanman King was so stubborn, that he had to be captured & released seven times before he opted to hear the terms of the legendary Shu strategist, Zhuge Liang. The reason why I view this song as ironic is because, despite having that hybrid tribal feel to it, this song wasn't used as the Nanman theme in DW6 because they didn't expand on the conflict in that particular game or the next. The Nanman didn't get a proper return to form until Dynasty Warriors 8, which is when this song was reassigned and became their rightful theme. You'd think it would have been the obvious choice, but here we are...

Anyways, we're granted a special occasion this month. Because the chosen Anthem represents two characters from its respective game, I get the pleasure of designating it to two characters from a fighting game. Wouldn't you know it? Someone went ahead and made my job easier by facilitating that years ago.


"If you ain't got kin, you ain't got nuthin'..."

The original wild bunch, Tam Tam & Cham Cham from the Samurai Shodown series. I can't think of any other sibling characters that physically embody the terms "big brother" (9'4") & "little sister" (5'2") like these two do. Tam Tam -- who shall be referred to as "Big T" for the remainder of this article -- is a heroic warrior of his village, Green Hell. (Name of the place practically screams "tourist destination", doesn't it?) Green Hell was the chosen place to house the Palenke & Tangiers Stones, insanely powerful artifacts with their origins tracing to the ancient evil of Ambrosia. When Amakusa stole the Palenke Stone, Big T was charged with the task of retrieving it. While he was successful in this mission, the victory would be short-lived. On the other side of the proverbial coin was his precocious & precarious younger sister, Cham Cham -- who will be referred to as "Li'l C" for the remainder of this article -- who, because she taught it looked pretty, "borrowed" the Tangiers Stone. This led to the divine punishment of her brother by being transformed into a chimpanzee for failure to protect the stone. To make matters worse, a goblin under the employ of Mizuki would then steal it from her. As a younger sibling myself, I can only hope & pray that I never did anything to get my brothers or sisters in THAT much trouble.

Now, thankfully, the Stones made their way back to Green Hell & Big T was restored to his normal (gigantic) self. With everything more or less resolved, I could only imagine the celebration that went down in the village after all that. This is where "Tropical Wars" comes into play. Barring the obvious relationships between the two pairs, there are some notable similarities there. Anachronisms be damned, that would be an amazing party song for a tribe like that. I could see Big T & Li'l C now, dancing and howling with the rest of the family until the wee hours of the night. On a side note, there's another connection between these two & the Nanman. With Big C standing at an astounding 9'4", I can't help but be reminded of the Nanman officer Wutugu. In every depiction of his character, he's always portrayed as just towering over everyone else on the battlefield. I wonder if those two are close enough in height to have a convincing staredown? Hmm, the world may never know...

Until next time... keep fighting the good fight, my friends.

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